Request for comment

Yesterday, I went to the Bicycle Film Festival and saw a documentary called “Best Day Ever.” It follows people with spinal cord injuries and a community in Vermont that’s building adaptive mountain biking trails designed to work for everyone.

One moment in the film really stuck with me:

An adaptive mountain biker invites a trail builder to actually ride with him in an adaptive bike. Even though the trail builder has been building MTB trails for 10 years, that was the first time he’d been in an adaptive bike. And because of that hands-on experience, he realized how he could start to make all of his trails more accessible, with very little additional effort.

It was a powerful reminder that as designers, we need to put ourselves in our users’ shoes. There’s really no substitute for trying something firsthand.

A friend texted me this morning:

Hey where do you always find such good restaurant recs? I usually am just [scouring] social media lol but are you subscribed to anything?

Here’s my reply (lightly edited):

That’s very kind of you!

GO WIDE

I source possibilities from:

• Eater
• The Infatuation
• NYT Cooking
• UA eats
• Reddit

FILTER

From there, I remove:

• Anything overpriced (some exceptions)
• Any bad health ratings

DIG DEEPER

Then:
Spend time reading recent reviews on Google Maps. The “best” reviews are often from a few years ago. Chefs/staff have turned over or quality has slipped, so it’s good to know what recent reviews say. I also cross-reference published reviews, interviews with the chefs/owners, & sometimes check out their Instagrams.

TALK TO PEOPLE

But more than anything, it’s just word of mouth—from friends or anybody I talk to.

For example, an old lady did my bloodwork at Quest Diagnostics & I could tell her last name was Polish. When I asked what Polish food she recommended in Greenpoint, she raved about “Restaurant Relax.” Total hole in the wall, but amazing goulash, potato pancakes, and stuffed cabbage.

I also like to hunt for spots that are near something I’m doing. So, I’ll search for the best spots near X museum. And start my hunt that way.

Hunting for great food reminds me of hunting for bargain-priced stocks; I love the process of finding a great restaurant, almost as much as I love eating the food with friends.

P.S. Today I tried Bagel Pub because Sabrina (sister) recommended it. I had an everything bagel with pesto cream cheese—delicious! I have a goal to try a new bagel & slice every 2 weeks.

I turn off my computer. And my phone. Then, I switch off the lights, the lamps, and the fan in the living room.

With each switch, the silence grows. The humidifier exhales its last mist.

And then, all I hear is the whir of the fridge. That and my dog’s gentle sighs as she snoozes lazily on the couch.

It’s quiet—well, at least, as quiet as you can get in NYC, in a 4th floor walkup.

I like this blissful state. It reminds me of when I was 4 or 5 years old. Before phones were ubiquitous. Before screens became intermediaries for friendship and hobbies.

To be clear, analog isn’t better. It’s objectively worse, in so many ways: CDs and records get scratched. Art and photographs fade from exposure to the sun. Mugs, they break.

But that encourages you to treat things. Things. As precious.

A couple years ago, I went to Rocka Rolla in Williamsburg, alone on a Friday night. I set a simple rule for myself: Have one drink and don’t look at my phone. That evening I met a stranger from Massachusetts and we became fast friends chatting about basketball.

I guess, it just feels ironic that these devices that were meant to connect us to everyone have become such an obstacle to meeting the people who are right in front of us. That’s all.

I’ve noticed a concerning trend in virtual meetings. Here’s what happens: Somebody gives a presentation on a complicated topic—a launch plan, a project with a big dependency, a new way of doing things. Then, they pause for questions and there are none!

Hang on a moment! No questions? Seriously?!

This is deeply concerning. Over time, failing to ask questions leads to confusion, false consensus, and breakdowns in communication. To me, the worst thing is when the presenter leaves thinking everybody is aligned. (That’s rarely the case.)

So, why does this happen? I have a couple hunches.

1. Nobody is listening. They’re busy—they’re working, they’re eating, they’re just not “present.”
2. People need time to digest. If the audience actually was listening, they probably need a moment. Don’t mistake silence for comprehension.

What can we do?

In my own meetings, I’m establishing a few standards to improve our presenter + audience environment.

For the presenter

• During the presentation: Use sign posts — If you need a specific person or team to hear something, mention them! “Sam, I know you’re working on XYZ. This next feature is relevant to you.” In speech & debate, we called these “sign posts.” They’re little verbal cues that re-engage your audience—and they help ensure that your key stakeholders actually hear the most important parts of your presentation.
• After the presentation: Give everybody a minute — Ask for 1 minute of complete silence at the end of your presentation before launching into a Q&A. Don’t give into the temptation to make small talk. Instead, let everyone think for a minute. It’s intentional, it’s valuable, and the questions will come.

For the audience

• Be present: Close your other windows (especially Slack)
• Be present: Keep your camera on
• Be present: Take notes during the presentation

I’ll continue to refine my approach & may update this post as I test new strategies with my team.

Back in 2019, I had the chance to interview Stewart Brand—the Whole Earth Catalog founder who helped shape how we think about information sharing and collaborative systems. Brand understood something fundamental: the best ideas don’t emerge fully formed from a single mind. They evolve through open dialogue, iteration, and community input.

This stuck with me as I was setting up this blog and its URL system. Why follow the tired convention (e.g., /blog/ or /insights/)when there’s a much better model sitting right in front of us?

Enter the RFC: Request for Comments.

For over 50 years, RFCs have been the backbone of internet development. Every major protocol, from HTTP to TCP/IP, started as someone saying “here’s an idea—what do you think?” These weren’t proclamations from on high, but working documents designed to be challenged, refined, and improved.

That’s exactly how I want to approach design thinking here. My posts aren’t definitive statements, they’re starting points for conversation. Whether I’m breaking down a product decision, exploring a design pattern, or questioning industry assumptions, I’m really saying: “Here’s my current thinking—help me make it better.”

So when you see /rfc/ in the URL, know that your comments, disagreements, and extensions are not just welcome—they’re the whole point! Like the internet itself, the best ideas here will always be the ones we build together.

Now, about that comment system…

Note: This post was drafted in collaboration with Claude, Sonnet 4